Santa Claus Is ST-ing to Town
by aaquater
Summary: As Nico found out, it's not a good idea to bet against Leo Valdez.


_A Christmas special! :) Moi nicht own PJatO._

* * *

><p>Nico knew he should never have made a bet against Leo Valdez. He rarely made bets, period, but this had seemed like the perfect opportunity down a peg, a sure win. He should've known Leo was no fool and it all had been a trick; maybe he would've avoided the sight he was being treated to. Unlike Calypso, Nico certainly didn't consider Leo's grinning face as something worthwhile staring at.<p>

"So tell me, Nico," Leo began innocently, "have you ever wondered about name meanings?"

"Not really," Nico said flatly, inching away before Leo could put a hand on his shoulder.

The son of Hephaestus' hand fell down awkwardly, but Leo used it immediately for animated and, in Nico's opinion, unnecessary explanation.

"See, I'm Leo," he continued and Nico swallowed down the deadpan 'Nice to meet you.' "Leo means 'lion,' so I can, like, rawr and stuff."

Nico decided not to comment, but his hand was twitching towards his sword. Especially at the paw motion Leo made with his – burning, for good measure – hand.

"But what I've come across is _your_ meaning. And it's _very_ intriguing. Do you know it?"

"Never bothered to find out," Nico replied emotionlessly.

"Well, fear not, for I'll tell you!" A couple of sparkles flew out of Leo's head. "It is… the victory of people!"

"So?" A horrible suspicion rose in Nico's mind. "I hope you don't want to tell me that since my name includes Nike, I'm going to become your new huggy cuddly sleep bunny."

"What?" Leo looked befuddled at first, but then his expression cleared. "Jason, that gossiper!" he huffed. "Next time, I'm gonna tell everyone about the time he… he… well, that doesn't matter. And no, I _don't _want you to become… well, what you said. I don't fancy my pants and butt sown together with a couple of arrows sticking out of it, thank you very much." Leo shuddered.

"What _do_ you want to say, then?"

"Just one teeny tiny thing I found interesting. Nico… is in fact a shortened form of Nicholas."

Nico's eyebrows disappeared under his hairline. "I know. So?"

"_So,_ the most famous bearer of this name is St. Nicholas. And he was the model of a person we now call…"

* * *

><p>"You want me to <em>what?<em>"

Piper was shocked, and Nico couldn't blame her. She had been leaning on the doorframe of her cabin's front door and almost slipped and faceplanted when Leo dropped the bombshell. It was only a certain amount of anti-Leo immunity she'd gained over the months that saved her from embarrassing herself.

"You heard me, Beauty Queen. Come on, it'll be amazing!" Leo was rubbing his palms in enthusiasm so fast, he would've generated heat even if he wasn't a fire bearer.

"And you're alright with it, Nico?" Piper asked disbelievingly.

Nico crossed his arms, glaring into space. "Guess." Behind him, Leo showed her thumbs up.

Piper blinked. "Well, if anyone has something like that, it's one of my siblings," she decided before disappearing in her cabin.

"I really hate you," Nico said without turning around.

Leo chuckled. "Who has everything in his head, doesn't fall for a stupid bet," he sing-songed.

* * *

><p>"This is the first thing I found."<p>

Piper threw a bunch of red clothes at Nico, who caught it with distaste, not noticing how the daughter of Aphrodite hid a smile behind her hand.

Nico unrolled the clothes, and when the secret was revealed, Leo burst out laughing, Piper soon following him. Nico, staring at the clothes like they'd come from the outer space, only said two firm words.

"No. Way."

It was a Santa's Little Helper dress, complete with fur lining and a tall red hat. Two Ephialtes-styled shoes fell out of the bundle and laid innocently on the ground, where they were being scorched by Nico's glare. The dress was styled for the perfect hourglass figure, with a belt so short nobody with BMI over 18 had a chance of putting it on. All in all, it was not the style Nico preferred to create his wardrobe out of.

"Oh, that's awesome! Put it on," Leo said encouragingly through peals of laughter.

"Never," Nico gritted through his teeth.

"It should fit you," Piper said, trying to keep her voice from wavering. "It's Lacy's and she's about as tall as you, so…"

"I don't care!"

Piper sighed. "You're no fun. Alright, swap it with those." She took the dress from Nico's hands and leaned into her cabin. When she emerged, she was holding a similar-looking, but bulkier roll of red-and-white cloth.

Nico inspected the bundle with scrutiny. "Is that at least men's?"

"I guess." Piper shrugged. "Mitchell gave it to me. It should be alright, but maybe it's not; Mitchell's got a strange sense of humor sometimes."

"At least he does have some, unlike a certain someone," Leo teased, nudging Nico. The son of Hades slapped his hand away.

"And you want me to do this when?" he grumbled.

Leo shrugged. "Around campfire time, I guess."

Nico took a deep breath and glowered at the clothes in his hands. "For the first and last time in my life, Valdez."

* * *

><p>Campfire was going smoothly. People were chatting happily, some were singing, some covering their ears because of the aforementioned. Couples were huddled close to each other, enjoying the other's body heat in the chilly December air. Flames were crackling orange. Katie chasing the Stolls around for covering her hair in sticky melted marshmallows was mostly ignored by everyone who wasn't in the process of being trampled by the three. It was a typical winter evening in Camp Half-Blood… until the chatter was broken by the sound of bells.<p>

A reindeer emerged from the forest… or, at least some parts of it, for the mammal was way past its expiration date. The skeleton seemed happy in its gallop, bells hanging off his neck and huge antlers. It was pulling a sled, which was sliding slowly on the snowy ground and attracting wide-eyed stares and, later, laughter.

Standing in the sled and waving at the campers, Nico felt more foolish than ever before. He was no showman; he had no idea how to act in front of an audience he was supposed to amuse, but he stuck to Leo's program as much as he could. He didn't Shadow Travel out when he had the chance, at least. And the rest was probably done by his ridiculous outfit.

From the hat to the pointy elfish shoes, in his own eyes Nico was a fashion disaster. The thick red cloak was slipping from his shoulders and if it was up to him, he would've thrown it in the fire. The sleeves were too long and the shoes were fit for a jester; he had to lean his head a bit to keep the hat on. Never again.

"Merry Christmas!" Nico hollered hoarsely, searching for Leo in the crowd so he could send him the fiercest glare possible.

And there he was, enjoying the spectacle he'd cooked up and showing Nico thumbs up. Nico seethed inwardly. Looking around, he saw more faces, more surprised reactions. Piper, giggling and hiding her face behind her jacket. Travis and Connor, rolling on the floor laughing. Will, staring open-mouthed. Jason, choking on his own saliva. Percy, his s'more stuck halfway towards his mouth. Annabeth, trying to force Percy's s'more where it was supposed to go. Chiron, shaking his head in bewilderment.

"Happiness and candy for everyone!" Nico took several handfuls of little Polish bonbons Leo had given him in a red pouch and threw them into the crowd. Some fell in the fire, but Nico didn't care; the gods never complained about too much sacrifice.

Finally, the reindeer skeleton pulled Nico's sled out of sight and into the forest again. Nico sighed and dismissed the animal, slumping into the sled and taking the hat off. He watched the bones sink into the ground, his face burning in embarrassment. Absentmindedly, he reached into Leo's pouch and fished out a bonbon, popping it into his mouth.

Leo… Leo was going to pay. Even though the bonbon was quite delicious.

* * *

><p>Leo couldn't sleep. His siblings were snoring happily all around him, but he just couldn't help himself. Every time he tried to relax, an image of Nico dressed up as Santa Claus popped into his mind and he began shaking in laughter. Sometimes, Leo thought, he was even better than he gave himself credit for. But it wasn't all sunshine, really, being so awesome. There were issues.<p>

Leo snorted. Sunshine. Nico. Fitting.

The blanket slipped from Leo's feet. He tugged it back to cover his sock fillings.

The cabin was dark, but Leo felt like it was getting even darker. He supposed it was his eyes being tired and sending him to sleep, but… what was the rustling, then?

Must be some insect, Leo decided, rolling onto his side and hoping Hypnos would finally find him. He imagined he was a university student, listening to a lecture by Clovis. Yeah, that should send him to sleep…

The shadows above Leo solidified into a shape. A teenage boy landed on the ground next to his bed.

"Merry Christmas, Leo Valdez!"

In the Hephaestus Cabin, many kids were woken up by a high-pitched scream.


End file.
